Divine Alchemy and Radical Self-Love: A Conversation with Noha Essop

Come, join me on an intimate exploration as I speak with Noha, a divine alchemist and healer from South Africa who has masterfully combined teachings from a variety of modalities and teachers. Noha illuminates her unique journey, beginning with a profound questioning and search for the Divine as a teenager, and the surprising path that led to a deeper understanding of healing and self-love.

Noha's perspective is beautifully steeped in her faith as a Muslim, adding a rich layer to her experiences and teachings. We explore not only how her religion and spirituality has shaped her work, but also engage in a thoughtful discussion about the significance of reflection and gratitude when connecting with the Divine. Listening to Noha's story is refreshing as she describes how she pushes through dogma and rigidity to a place of curiosity and openness.

At the end of our conversation, Noha shares a traditional Islamic song of gratitude from her hometown of Cape Town.


Find Noha and her offerings online here: https://linktr.ee/_Noha_?fbclid=IwAR35q6eij0UGKlRb_uoIhTyaJQXAWEpbn0Z-6uLxwNroobRt-vZiehFbhkE

Transcript

Rose: 0:22

I'm Dr Rose Aslan and I'm a transformational life coach, breathwork teacher and scholar religion who supports helpers, rebels, misfits, marginalized, and spiritual and spiritually curious folks. Welcome to Rahma with Rose, where I create a bold space of warmth, understanding and pluralism in a world that often feels chaotic, polarized and judgmental. You are not alone, and the stories I share here will reinforce this. Each episode will delve into inspiring stories, practical tips and thought provoking and heartfelt conversations with thought leaders, healers, coaches, mental health professionals and other individuals who are part of the quiet revolution of women healing around the world. So join me on this podcast exploration, as we explore what happens when we allow compassion into our lives, one story at a time. Hello, and welcome to another episode of Rahma with Rose today.

Rose: 1:46

I am really pleased to welcome Noha to my episode. I wanted to connect with and I really wanted other people to hear what she has to offer to the world. Noha is a divine alchemist and she is deeply inspired to help people eradicate self-deprecation and shame when I'm also my personal favorite topics to work on as well, she effortlessly supports them to connect to the divine love, divine timing and radical self-love, resulting in expressing their truest soul purpose. Through her intuition, noha transcends people's confusion, lack of creativity, unworthiness, disconnection and fears back to the radically empowered self. That gave me shivers, noha.

Rose: 2:36

As I read that, I was like everything you sent me about your bio just resonated with me inside, and I'm so excited to be able to speak about this and many more topics connected to your work and your life experiences and your wisdom. So, before we start, I just want to mention how we met, because it was just a really beautiful act of synchronicity. Last year, in 2022, I spent a number of times visiting a derga, sufi lodge of the Mevlavi Sufi order in Konya in Turkey, where I live in Istanbul, and I was spending time with this beautiful community of people from different countries around the world, and it was in the fall. Is that correct?

Rose: 3:16

I think it was in October, when every evening we never know who'd be joining the community for the evening. And so one evening I walked into the reception room and living room and there I saw Noha and her husband and I just immediately felt I went to speak to them and there was just this beautiful act of synchronicity that she also does similar work and has much wisdom and teachings to share, and we had this lovely evening talking with one another and her husband, and I'll never forget the Capetownian zikr or was it the songs that you shared with us from the Sufi tradition of Muslims from Cape Town and that, like, really resonated with me and it was just such an amazing act of synchronicity. That night we met in Konya in the derga, coincidentally, so thank you for coming and joining me on the podcast, noha.

Noha: 4:04

You're welcome and thank you so much for having me. I love having conversations with old people. I think that our initial meeting again divinely led and orchestrated, as it were, and it leads us to collaborations like these. It leads us to be able to share wisdom that is not only of benefit to us but to others.

Rose: 4:24

In short, Exactly, and I decided to do this podcast because I wanted to interview people and speak to women specifically, whose voices aren't out there enough. Especially, I'm starting to speak primarily with Muslim women, but who are a little bit out of the off the beaten path, who are less known in the mainstream Muslim majority context, and so I was just so interested in what you have to offer and so excited to hear more. So let's start with this question that I like to ask everyone Can you remember when you first started getting interested in spirituality and or the healing path in your life? And you can start by talking about your interest in spirituality and healing separately or together, based on how they came up in your life.

Noha: 5:06

I think the first recollection I have of my spiritual journey was at the age of 16, 15 or 16. And I know I was in a dark space as a teenager. I was my final year of high school and I just remember looking up at the ceiling as if God was there, and so, remember, we grew up thinking God is this anthropomorphic and big man in the sky. And I looked up at the senior and I said why am I here? And I realized, obviously many years later, that this is a very dense question to have been asking as a 15-16 year old, but I had this intense desire to know what was the need for me to be on earth. I had no basis for knowing that God is the ruler of all and can decide, and I knew that he had decided for me to be here, and I wanted to know why. I wanted to understand what is the reason for me being here in order for me to fulfill that. I didn't get a direct answer, but what I did know was that if I wasn't needed here, I would be struck from earth. It was that simple, and so it gave me the indication that I was needed, that I was meant to be here and that I was loved and supported in being here, which was a beautiful thing to experience at that time. I also grew up with a lot of sibling rivalry and jokes and things. I'm the baby of the family and I was always told mom and dad didn't mean to have you, hey, but you were a mistake, and so that, I think, weighed heavily on me at a certain point where I decided was it my parents' choice of having me or was it God's choice in me being here? And I think that gave me a very strong connection with God, which I didn't quite understand. I went through life kind of testing that relationship and connection, being very rebellious Because I was quite literally trying to figure out so are you going to strike me out, can I go on? And that led to a very adventurous life, I will admit One I have absolutely no regrets about.

Noha: 7:28

But I think, as I went on Hajj when I was 31, in fact, I turned 32 on the day of Hajj in 2008. And I came back from that beautiful journey having more questions than answers, I came back and I said I want to know and understand how does all of this work, this being life, this being Earth, this being the galaxies, the universe. I wanted to understand it and so I immediately started a journey of learning, which I took the scientific route at first studying with Dr John DiMattini, and a year into that experience and learning, my four-year-old son had experienced some severe headaches which every doctor I took him to thought was sinuses. To cut a long story short, it ended up that he had a brain tumor at the age of four. And that incident. So those incidents at age 16, and asking the question the year before, in 2008,.

Noha: 8:31

By the time I got to the year 2009, when this was happening, I understood why I went on Hajj the year before Because I had to embody Allah Almighty. I had to embody, o God, I am here. I am here at your service. I had to embody and realise and surrender, which I call a radical surrender In knowing that I am not in control here, even though I am a mother, I am not in control. My child is not mine. I am a custodian, I am a guide, I am a navigator, I am a parameters shower, but I am not the owner of this child.

Noha: 9:11

That was really the start of a deeper and much deeper journey where I went on studying a few different modalities. I studied with Dr Di Martini still do, 14 years down the line. I have studied NLP practitioner level masters, including trainers training, so I qualify other practitioners as well. I have studied clinical hypnotherapy, energy healing. I have studied business gosh that is an endless load and crystal healing and because I was interested in the science of God, I wasn't quite satisfied when I had an Imam or a Sheikh say to me that this is an interpretation and this is what I should believe. I always had questions and that's when Allah brought me this guide, a Sheikh with Lala or explained our beautiful Dean to me through the science in mind that I had, which was a heart opening for me to be able to marry the two, and that's been my journey ever since.

Rose: 10:16

Thank you, and I really understood why we resonated so much going on this path of starting as a rebel and questioning everything. I'm also have the very similar personality Question everything, don't do anything that someone tells you unless you prove for yourself that it works right, and don't accept answers unless they make sense to you. So that really resonates with me as well, noha. And then you find your own path that works for you, not because someone told you, but because you feel into it. So that's just really beautiful to hear this story, because we don't hear that enough in the Muslim communities and that are out there right now. You know that there's actually different ways to follow this path of spirituality within Islam and I think it's important your voice is important to hear. So how would you describe the spiritual path you're on? You mentioned Sheikh Fadala Haeri, who's also a believer in South Africa. How do you describe this path and what it means to you? D.

Noha: 11:11

I think that's the short answer. I believe each and every human being is free in their own right. We are sovereign beings and when I know that I am on a path where I am free to connect, to speak, to be guided by the one, that I can be in conversation and feel deeply, guided by what I receive as answers, to be in my heart space for no other reason other than just feeling love, for me the spiritual path isn't rocket science. You know, somebody said to me the other day the path is simple, it is absolutely simple, but it may not always be easy, and I agree with that, because the paths that are not easy is still our resistance, to want to hold onto an old way of being, on old way of doing. And for me those are the veils, those are the veils of our hearts that we need to let go of.

Noha: 12:19

Some may refer to the jihad of nerves. He's just simple, but it's also beautiful to be able to walk in the street, to be in a garden and be able to see the presence of God and to have a tangible that is no longer this boogeyman in the sky, but someone or something, some energy that is very much entrenched and held lovingly in my heart. That, for me, is the spiritual journey.

Rose: 12:49

I love that Describing the path as simple, but it also can be hard at times, and that's the paradox that's so hard for a lot of us to grasp. If it's simple, then why does it often feel so hard? How do you reconcile this when you work with clients or other people in your life? How do you help them reconcile this paradox?

Noha: 13:07

How often we overcomplicate. Generally, as human beings, we're overcomplicating the way in which of the causation of our overcomplication is. We have stories that we run in our minds repeatedly and those stories snowballs into bigger stories and bigger stories. But in reality they started off in one place, one particularly event or stage of one's life, and it's to find a different perception of that event. So it's to navigate our way through all of the current to go back to the old and to go and unpick. I call this excavation. It's just excavation needs to discovery. But for me life is about a grand discovery. It's to be enchanted by the beauty we find within ourselves. And so for many of my clients, who often find it difficult to reconcile, I'm blessed that over the years I've been taught how to find and help people find the blessings and the lessons in their deepest trauma. I'm also being blessed to have experienced the deepest traumas that life has to offer. So I come as living proof that overcoming is very possible and probable, highly likely.

Rose: 14:28

The way you reframe experiencing deepest traumas as blessing really shook me, because so many people experience different kinds of traumas in their lives. To call it a blessing would be quite difficult for most people, so I love that you call it your deepest blessing the fact that these were parts of your life that made you who you are. So you mentioned a couple of healing modalities. You mentioned Dr Martinez, whose work I'm not familiar with. You mentioned Epi. You mentioned crystal healing. Could you tell us more about some of these healing modalities? Why did these ones resonate with you? Because I'm sure that you've tried others. So what is about these ones that really worked for you and you found some important healing in them? Because I'm going to assume that people listening might not be familiar with all of these modalities.

Noha: 15:13

Yeah. So the first one is Dr John DeMorthini. He developed something called the DeMorthini method, which he would say to you is a tool of a thousand uses. But John really taught me the science behind divinity to understand how the laws of the universe, when we speak about polarity or the law of duality, how it exists and why it exists, and when does duality become oneness and what is God's presence in that duality. So duality as an example pain and pleasure. Why is the pain there, not just the pleasure, and when is the pain and the pleasure there and how are they in equal amounts? So that was a massive shift in my life to understand that.

Noha: 15:59

But it was a rabbit hole that I had gone down for many years. And again, rabbit holes are good a lot of the time, but often we have to remain self-accountable and do self-checks, because sometimes those rabbit holes are actually just plugging holes of our own inadequacy. At what point do we say I'm enough and I know enough and I'm going to allow the wisdom to come through me rather than me seeking it outside? I love NLP as a modality, but today I teach it very differently from the way in which I was taught it. I teach it, so I call it now conscious NLP, because I teach students how to be present in divinity before coaching and during coaching, to not be reliant on which process or which technique, but to know how it works and why it works so that when they become present with the client it's going to trust that it's naturally going to come to them, which they all do. I think some of the modalities for me that has probably done the most healing for me was probably those two.

Rose: 17:07

And for listeners who aren't familiar with NLP, could you tell us briefly how do you support clients through NLP? What happens in a session where you're using and integrating NLP into a session?

Noha: 17:17

Yeah, so NLP stands for Neuro Linguistic Programming, and it's basically the study of how we use language to create our conditioning and therefore how we can use language to deconstruct it, to change it, and so it is the study of one of the studies rather so it's not going to be the only one of how to change beliefs, how to change significant emotional events in the past, to bring about healing in a way that is deep and permanent as well. So today I use it moist talk therapy. I don't necessarily do the techniques per se, but it comes through in my language use and so I can see the effects are the same. I use NLP intertwined with what Shesford Lala has taught me, intertwined with what John Demortini has taught me, intertwined with what Michael Bernard Beckwith has taught me. I am a mixture of every experience I've ever had. When I speak or work with clients, there's no one that comes to the forefront. In reality, today I am the modality. I don't have a guru out there. Mine is in my heart and I practice reliance on that.

Rose: 18:40

Beautiful. So then, if you were to describe Noah's modality, which perhaps was briefly described in the bio you gave me and that I shared, how would you describe that? I'm so? Curious People who aren't familiar again with the vocabulary, modalities and healing. Who are in this world that we're in? How would you describe it to someone who doesn't really have?

Noha: 19:00

much of a background.

Noha: 19:00

I'm curious because I mean the process of writing a framework for it, because I'm wanting to teach other healers, coaches, this modality. In its simplest form, the outcome of the modality is to help people open their hearts and be connected to divinity. That's the ultimate outcome. But I believe in order to get there, we have to do the unveiling, or the recalibration, and so the how to create that recalibration ie healing is to look at what are the triggers in our lives, to look at the areas of our lives that are quite bringing us the joy and the excitement or the ease that we are choosing for ourselves, and to look at those areas and start asking quality questions. Not questions that's going to lead us again down a rabbit hole of feeling inadequate, but rather asking the right questions to bring about the understanding of where is the blessing. We are never, ever, going to receive anything or experience anything in our lives that isn't for our highest good. He, the Divine, the Great Beloved, is not going to give us anything that we are incapable of handling. And that's not just words, it's actually scientific, it can be scientifically proven.

Noha: 20:17

In everyone's life we experience the. I experience a child going through brain tumors three times. I cannot begin to tell you the blessing that was in my life. It is who I am today. It's because of that that I'm on this path today. It's because of that that I get to help hundreds of people a year, if at all.

Noha: 20:38

So many of our challenges places us on a path of service, and when we are awoken to that service and we realize that we are here to be of service to creation, because the Creator has made it, wow, what a job. Wow. So the modality in its framework is not complete, but it's an infusion of understanding, a lot of the things that I had to understand through the years and to embody the version of who I'm choosing to become, moment by moment, and to know and recognize through my awareness when I'm misaligned. Because, oh, I've had another growth spurt in my spirituality, because the more the growth spurt comes this is my observation the quieter you become, the less you have to say. Your energy speaks for more than what your words even require you to say. There isn't this urgency to want to say you speak. So that is the modality in and of itself the deeply self-loving one.

Rose: 21:49

It feels absolutely majestic the way you speak about it. It's such a treat that you have this to offer as your gift to the world, through your life experiences forming your own modality that so many people can benefit from. So it's beautiful and I think it's unique, because there's a lot of people around the world who work in healing modalities. But I think it's very special that you come from a Muslim background and you've had to reconcile, coming from an environment that could be more conservative not necessarily your family, but just in general. Mainstream Islam is quite conservative and not often open to the kinds of things we're talking about right here right now, which is why I'm making this podcast. So would you be willing to talk about and share how have you navigated being a Muslim on this path, doing things that are necessarily spoken about, that aren't necessarily acceptable even for mainstream Muslims? I'd love to hear more about that.

Noha: 22:37

That path wasn't easy, rose, I'm not going to lie. It still isn't, and I think that's in reference to the comment earlier. It's simple but it's not easy. I can have my teachings in a great simplicity, but the readily, receptivity or the receiving of my message is not always going to be easy. I think the first thing that I remind myself of is that many people are going to reject that which they know nothing about. They are going to be fearful and judgmental of something that they don't understand, and so that frame of reference gives me the opportunity to have compassion towards those who ridicule, reject or, worse yet, have things to say about what it is that I do or how I do it.

Noha: 23:25

I didn't land here in this position and in the work that I do it, in the way in which I do it and the way in which I look, for that matter, because I was being rebellious. I wholeheartedly believe I'm being used for a purpose far greater than what I can see right now, and I've written about this many a times before, but my aim and my only focus is to focus on what Allah wants of me. Other people say and I know most people are well-meaning they fear for me and people like me, which is only ever again a reminder to call on my protection from the great Beloved and to give deep thanks for that every day. And also one of the things that I have repeatedly asked, probably for the last two or three years, because that's when it becomes more intense, the work that I'm having to do and the way in which I'm having to do it, is that my constant prayers to Allah, to Allah, to Allah to please give me the strength to be obedient to what he wants of me and to give me the courage to step into that which he's asking of me and the way in which he's asking of me. And so some days I call, some days I'm so afraid I'm just going to hide, but for the most part, I'm going to take the step.

Noha: 24:49

That's the time when I remember that I have the greatest power with me, that I don't need to fear another human being. So it hasn't been easy, but I think one of the things that has also been a saving grace for me is that I suddenly use my head. I think it was Rumi that says when you speak from the heart, hearts will listen, and so I've let go of needing to speak to people's minds and to the intellect and to the understanding. My work is a long game. When I get to impact the heart, I know that I've opened it up for the deeper entrance of divine love. That's my only job. I'm just a gatekeeper. I hope open gates to hearts.

Rose: 25:37

These are really powerful words to know how, Thank you. I work with primarily been all Muslim clients and also I interact with a lot of Muslims in my life and so many of them have this feeling, this inkling that what they see in mainstream Islam isn't working for them, but they have so much fear and guilt and shame which are things you work with that if they go off that path and they seek their own path, like the one you're describing, there will be consequences that they're scared of and they feel alone. They feel like they're the only ones. I'm sure you've met many of these people as well. What would you say to these people who want to go in a direction that feels heart centered and embodied, but they're full of fear?

Noha: 26:21

and guilt. It's the things that I say to my clients every day, also around sacred circles, and this is probably one of the hot topics and all my things, as I've been instructed, is all non-denominational For me. I've always reminded that we are bursting to this world alone and that we die alone and we leave this world alone. Yes, our sense of belonging is important and necessary from time to time, as is our togetherness, and therefore we gather, but we are only answerable to one and how. We are only to please the one. And yes, it's going to be intimidating I would actually use the word intimidating when we feel that we potentially going off a path that others have written for us and deemed the only way. But if you can still find the Quranic verses and the Quranic teachings that supports your life, then why is there anything wrong with it?

Noha: 27:23

My first guidebook is the Quran, and not just the Quran in how someone else has told me to understand it, that when I open it and I read it and I understand that English first, because that's my first language I sit with it and I contemplate that that, for me, is okay. Now that I've contemplated, now that I've understood it for myself, how do I now love that. For me it's. I know I spoke about this one year at a Sufi conference and I said that, in order for us to love the Qur'an, it's not about taking these many facets and just pulling them all together and saying, okay, this is how we move forward. I noticed in reading the Qur'an several times, cover to cover that these two things that stood out for me so often, if only you are people who reflect, if only you are people who are grateful. And I was like, why would that be repeated so often? Truly, this is important, so important. So I took to heart that I need to be someone who reflects and to contemplate life and to ask questions and to go deeper into understanding, and that I, by all means, will absolutely heed the advice of a teacher and a guide because I really believe that's necessary but one who is open enough for me to ask questions to.

Noha: 28:49

And that to be grateful is not just about oh, I think in your journal. These are the five things that I'm grateful for today. No, that's lip service. It's to be able to sit in sugar to boil your eyes out, that you've forgotten why you were grateful and for what specifically you are. You are just immensely overcome by being gifted with this life and being used in the way in which you are. That I'm sorry. That's just how do you. When you feel such a nearness to the Creator, why would anyone else matter? I feel that when other people's opinions matter more, then we have quieted the voice of the Divine to us.

Rose: 29:36

I feel so inspired right now by the words you're saying and I know I needed to hear this today, and I'm sure the people listening too also are going to really resonate and find something important to reflect on. And you chose my two favorite things from the Quran. Why do you not reflect? Why are you not grateful? There's something that Muslims seem to often forget that we need to use our intellect, our heart, to reflect on the Quran, to reflect on the world around us and to experience embodied gratitude, which I think you're describing in such beautiful ways. So thank you for sharing that amazing embodied understanding of the Quran. Really, I think that's what you just presented us. So, as we wrap up, would you share some pros and wisdom with the stars? You've already shared many, but just to sum up, what are some pros and wisdom? If you could just leave people with that, you would like them to remember from this conversation that maybe one thing, one deep lesson that served you that others might benefit from.

Noha: 30:32

I think, as a reminder, is good for the believer. We are inevitably going to go through uneasy times, difficult times, challenging and triggering times. Those things should be an immediate reminder to pause, to breathe deeply into our hearts because for me that's our heart. Space is the chamber of the Divine and to breathe deeply into our hearts to feel that love entering it, because it's already streaming to us. We're the ones that block it or cut it off. That's to open ourselves up to that Divine Love that is streaming into us and to remind ourselves it is our birthright to be Divinely protected, supported and loved. The Divine loves us absolutely and when we do that from moment to moment, day to day, we will strengthen our connectivity to the Divine and we will feel less jarred or shaken by the ordinary experiences that we are to have. That is necessary to have in the human experience. Our spirituality is to be infused with our human experience. Our spirituality is not to be used as an escape from our human experience. There's an integration that must happen. That's it.

Rose: 31:54

Such important words. I appreciate you sharing this, because so often I speak to people who think God has shut the door on them because of their actions, whereas you're reframing this in a way that actually we've shut the door and we can open it up once again. And what a different way of seeing the world that is, when you know that it hasn't been shut on you, that you perhaps have shut it a bit and put veils, and you can then open it up again and lift those veils off, that connection.

Noha: 32:21

So again, the 99 names are such beautiful embodied names that we too can feel into and become so. He's most merciful. He does not shut the door.

Rose: 32:37

Thank you deeply from the bottom of my heart for joining me.

Rose: 32:40

Can I put you on the spot and ask you to share one of those songs from Cape Town that's a traditional is it Sufi or just Muslim song from deep into the corner I was just so moved when I heard you and your husband share it last October and I would love, if you're comfortable, to share with people here just a very short song that resonates with you, that you find important in your tradition, your heritage, your spirituality Based on what we just spoke about.

Noha: 33:06

It's just giving shukr, so it goes like this. It's a lovely repetition. It just makes me so happy whenever I see it. Shukr Allah wa Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah wa Shukr Allah.

Rose: 33:21

Wa.

Noha: 33:22

Shukr Allah wa Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, wa Shukr Allah, it's just a repetition of shukr.

Rose: 33:33

Alhamdulillah wa Shukr Allah. Thank you, noha, and thank you for sharing your life experience and deep learnings with people here, so it's been a wonderful experience for me and, I'm sure, many others.

Noha: 33:47

Oh, thank you.

Rose: 33:55

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